Thursday, February 19, 2009

After my previous entry, the next few days were rather simple. Was having quite a tough time on Monday thinking about the whole relationship thingy with my Darling, and somehow some stuff persuaded me into throwing a huge tantrum at him. HAHA!!!
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Monday, i woke up by his call telling me wad time he reached home and all his crap and i was like damn pissed. So i continued to throw my tantrum.
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At night, i went to Da jiu's wake with 2kor, we went to help to fold the incense paper and have some short convos here and there with the relatives, some i know, some i dun really know.
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Went back home and it was around 10plus when i finished bathing. Darling did called but i didn't picked up. And my dear sister tricked me again and popped by my place with Hui that night.
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We had chats about my unhappiness and all other stuff and they fun sitting on my bed eating stuff. HAHA!
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Then i decided to go over to ting's place to sleepover after their psycho-ing. HA!
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We chatted about everything and i li xiao-ed darling at 2am.
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All 3 of us went into this state of forcing each other some secrets out. Although i was the giving party it somehow turned out rather bad in the end.
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We cooked Mee at 3plus am coz we were hungry.If I can recall, this friendship begin some 9 years ago when the 3 of us were in the same Primary School class, 5H, 6G. We grew up together, had times when we quarrel over funny little things which we looked back now and find them all crappy, but i guess those were the moments that made up part of our lives.
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We are all grown up now, having out problems, our lies, our happiness, our joys, and we still come together sometimes to make our friendship a celebration.
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Tuesday Morning, Lin Na called me and asked me to go rebond her hair with her at Darling's. She was still considering when she called though. And the very cute her called me for directions when we was at PIE. THANKS LOR! A direction idiot like myself directing another direction idiot. HAHA!!!!
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Still wasn't in good terms with Darling, and gave him cold shoulders the entire time when Lin Na was doing her hair.
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3plus pm, Lin Na was done, and she kind of make rounds in her car. In the end, i went to find Darling to have a good talk.
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Problems surfaced, Problems resolved, though not all were resolved, but at least some things were done to my unhappy times.
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Went to Da Jiu's wake again that night but left early coz i was really tired after not having enough rest.
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On Wednesday Morning, Mama woke me up to go to Da Jiu's last day. My stomach was playing tricks again so i ate the powder thingy.
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Went to help out a little although i was ston-ing a lot.
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十四年后,再一次失去了一个亲人...虽然认识他的机会很少,虽然失去他的痛没那么多,但看见妈妈流着眼泪的那一刻,我的眼睛也开始酸酸了...
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看到大舅母忍着眼泪,尝试感觉她的感觉,正当我们在给大舅最后的一份敬礼,看见棺车开起了门,想着棺木被抬上车,而棺里的人就是自己深爱一辈子的男人...........................................
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心里感觉酸酸痛痛的...
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当我告诉Darling之后,darling 告诉我,叫我向大舅说一声,“一路好走”,我的泪水几乎忍不住........
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我们不能看着棺木被抬上车,只听见,十位舅舅阿姨们,大声地哭泣,大声地不舍... 看见不熟悉的表哥表姐,推着棺车,送父亲最后一程,这样的感觉,我不能体会,只明白那种深深的疼痛..........
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我看着棺木慢慢地,进入了火化间,拦着妈妈的悲伤,看着坚强的阿姨舅舅们,失去大哥的痛..................
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凝重的环境,离去的他,悲伤的大家...
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就让大舅安心离去... 一路好走...
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Wasn't in much mood after the whole thing, i went to find Darling and told him everything, there was no way for comforting, just kind of tired after these few days of happenings....
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Went back home and rested until after dinner.
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I went to meet Ting, and she was sharing all the things with me. Then we walked around gombak then we went to find Darling.
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I walked Ting home simply coz i felt like doing so.
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Then i walked back to find Darling... And along the way, i was digesting the text messages from Hui.
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It seems hard to digest everyone's point of view yet stand your own ground in this kind of dispute. Or perhaps it cannot be catergorized as dispute, it is purely a simple misunderstanding which involved too many people.
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When a promise is made, a promise is made, think twice before breaking the promise. A good lesson learnt. But once you decide to break the promise, dun make it the fault of others regardless of the consequences. Dun make these misunderstandings the expense of the friendship nurtured for so long...
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Always be careful with the words used to talk to people no matter wad kind mood you are in, because it is those emotions that can screw everything.
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This is for all of you involved in the above misunderstandings, you know who you are, or i should say, we should know who we are. No hard feelings.... :)
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I stayed with Darling till 2am with his dee kakis. Then, he walked me home, pushing his bike along the way coz there wasn't an extra helmet. I fell asleep shortly after.
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Due to some of the above, i had quite a mood swing... Felt like going out but at the same time, dun feel like doing so. It was just a little bit too traumatic. Heh Heh....
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Went to school with Ting, and the unluckiest thing of all happened, 100plus spilled all over my bag. Hai......................
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Did everything for NUS application. We head to CCK for a movie.
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"He's just not that into you" Its a great movie. Its one of the two things which make me pretty happy the last few days.
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Went to find darling later in the evening and i watched TV there. He waited for bus with me then went to his dee kakis again. Hai... I told him to bahave already... :) Its up to him...
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I came home and washed up the stained-with-100plus bag and everything in it and had dinner.
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Finally came online and stayed online for a long period, haven't done this the last few days.
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有时真的累得不堪,感觉太多事情在那一瞬间发生了,自己却束手无策,不知该从哪儿开始... 人生真的是如此美妙... 不想长大的自己,不知不觉已经那么大了... 没想到会发生的事,也发生了... 人生或许起起落落,但重要的是过程,是这些每天发生的大小事,拼凑成了我们的故事...
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望一望走过的路,感慨万端...
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我知道我要走的路,要做的事,只希望拥有大家的祝福...

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