Today, i feel, i'm getting old, like really getting old. Its April now, and my Birthday is coming. Another year older than the last. sigh....
I'm flying off to Seoul this weekend. Thinking about the trips i've been to ever since i joined the association. I feel really lucky and at the same time, not. Seeing all the real things happening around me, starting to lose that skill of survival. And dishearten by the facts surfacing everywhere. The government that I respected started to show their flaws, and its painful to see that.
Loving all the trips, taking each like a milestone reached but i dun think i can do this for long. Nothing really to be envious of, its just as hard as staying in Singapore doing the same thing over and over. Yet, i am telling myself to JIA YOU and have fun with all of it.
My friends aren't doing well in love, neither am i. Seeing those breakups hurts just as much, thinking back and recalling how they've loved but no longer doing so now. Its funny how people changed that fast, how those ideals suddenly switched tracks and how one has to put up with it and carry on with life.
I don't think i can do that.
Mr Eddie Hoo has been lousy and like my work, i'm trying to put them at the back of my head and ignore them for a while.
Smile, World. It'll be very much better.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Down fall
Recently, i'm starting to feel that everything is not going smoothly. Every single thing that is happening doesn't have a good ending. Be it work, love or family. Making me feel like giving things up.
Was busy the last week covering duties for one of my colleague because he was overseas for work. Was at Pines for 1.5 days, and it kind of sux. The whole thing planned was turned upside down, the association incurred more expenses for the entire thing. I had to be shouted at for something stupid, and feeling awfully down throughout the weekend.
In love, eddie has decided to not do anything at the moment, all the effort i've put in has gone to waste and somehow, its my fault. Because i wanted a proper ROM ceremony, because i couldn't leave in Msia after marriage, because he is the only son, because i am the only daughter.... Seems like i'm a selfish bitch who is forcing him to do everything he never wanted.
In family, kept feeling that i'm being short changed because of my brothers. They really get what they wanted, really, everyone is on their side, but they feel like everything is in a mess. They are lucky, they can have everything they want, but me? Nobody seem to be looking out for wad i want.
See... Life is in a mess, everything is going down...
Was busy the last week covering duties for one of my colleague because he was overseas for work. Was at Pines for 1.5 days, and it kind of sux. The whole thing planned was turned upside down, the association incurred more expenses for the entire thing. I had to be shouted at for something stupid, and feeling awfully down throughout the weekend.
In love, eddie has decided to not do anything at the moment, all the effort i've put in has gone to waste and somehow, its my fault. Because i wanted a proper ROM ceremony, because i couldn't leave in Msia after marriage, because he is the only son, because i am the only daughter.... Seems like i'm a selfish bitch who is forcing him to do everything he never wanted.
In family, kept feeling that i'm being short changed because of my brothers. They really get what they wanted, really, everyone is on their side, but they feel like everything is in a mess. They are lucky, they can have everything they want, but me? Nobody seem to be looking out for wad i want.
See... Life is in a mess, everything is going down...
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