Hai....

O great! After much struggling with the crappy prob on this web, finally, the normal post is back... Hopefully, it lasts... heH!

HAppenings today? Ermm... Nothing much bah... Woke up very late today, dunnoe y, i can't seem to hear the alarm this couple of days. Ermm.. Maybe there's something wrong with my alarm? or is it me? HeH! Wadever... Then, rushed to school, still, my mind is calm... Nothing to panic bout... HeH!

In school, i was very tired, but i can't seem to fall asleep. I just kept yawning... Ha! Well, seriously, didn't really listen in class today, except during Chem and D&T lessons, for the rest, i was practically day-dreaming, or well, i'm listening but i didn't question it much. Ya... Only Chem and D&T, very attentive... Y?! Coz i didn't do well for chem and as for D&T, the class is small, so i tend to focus more, although my mind will drift away sometimes... heH!

Miss Teo was saying, that she dun believe we will write essays at home everyday but for me, haha! I've always been writing everyday... HeH! On this blog... However, i dunnoe whether there's any improvement... HeH! Funny huh?! ok, still waiting for EL paper to be back to determine that... HeH!

Erm... I dl-ed quite a lot of songs these 2 days... 1st was coz Bt kor asked for a song, then it's my own urge to look for nice songs, then, kelvin sent me 2 songs. So i got a few new(yet old) songs in my mp3... mUHAhAHA!!! Ok, i feel very bad bout making bt kor sad... Coz i sent him a song... Ok, so that song touched me when i was only 13. It talks bout my life(besides the love part), and nobody actually did listen to that song b4. And also, thru that song, kind of saw the serious side of JaCky Wu(the HoSt from taIwAN)... Well, i didn't mean to make kor sad de... Hai...

O yA!!! People! MUST GO WATCH SHEN HUA!!! Seriously! It's awesome.. Love it! I can watch it another time! bring it on man! It's great...

Ok, sometimes, when we talk, we gotta think bout who we are talking to, so as to avoid offending pple. I did just that today, not to mention who... Well, i didn't mean it... I was merely complaining bout my results. Well, it's really not my standard... Ermm... That depends on who i'm complaining to... Hai... Can't say much, the rest will go in my written diary bah...

For my results, i dunnoe wad to say liao... My aims are shattered i guess... Most of which i wanted to get a B3, i got a b4, for the one i want an A1, i got a b4... Shit! Everything B4, that sux! For those that understood the feeling of falling from glory, that's wad i'm experiencing... No more 3rd... The only A1 that i got is Maths... However, there are still a few subjects that we've not taken... Hopefully, D&T will have an A1 bah... I dun wanna say much, i dun wan pple to feel that i'm boasting wad i have, and agitating pple along the way. I'm just devastated... Well, at least the one that i talked to understood, only her...

No point complaining anymore... the result is clear, that is wad i've got... I failed in my own will to succeed. I failed my duty as a student. I lost myself... For now, time is all i've got, hopefully, it will amend all my mistakes... Dun wanna talk to pple in school bout my result le, they wun understand wad i'm going thru, they just... AiYA! Kept repeating wad i've said, sIAo!

Faizal told me he met his ex yesterday... ermm... Hurt and sweet? yup, a combination of both... Poor him... Still lost in the fate that heaven made... I pity him but i can't help... Nobody can... Only he can do it himself... Bless hIm...

HAo... End here! CiAo!!

Nobody seems to understand... In the same boat? On the same path? Fighting alongside? I doubt all these... Hatre in the eyes...

DAmn this ThINg!

Seriously, wad is wrong with the blog? So Weird... And i cant post properly... damn!

WaD iS going On?!

Ok, i dunnoe wad's going on on the blog, but how come this creating part is so odd? Everything are moved to the left... It looks weird, and being a computer-freak, i dunnoe wad the hell to do. But i got things to blog leh, anyway, i'm just typing here, it's weird... Hopefully, it can go on the posts.

Last night was a long night for me, wah, went all the way to Marina just for a dinner, heh! Ok lah, yuki yaki can only be found at Orchard and marina but kao, so tiring... Anyway, the eating part was funny i guess, we all got our own jokes to laugh bout. And Ha, i kept asking things bout salad, coz u see, i'm not a salad kind of person, Pam is, so i kept asking her. Y do they eat peas from the veg nia? And wad does it taste like? HAhA! And she doesn't eat salad with sauce de, weird neh... Then, Yuting and her usual self came out, kept teasing pple and there we went with all the craps. That's pretty much y the 2 of us click so much, both are just as crappy. Ok, i just regretted not eating as much Sushi... HAhA! My FAve Hor!

Dunnoe who on the air-con last night and didn't switch off the fan, the fan was like, right in front of me, i was god damn cold. Woke up in the middle of the night thinking y it's so cold, saw the window close so i tot it was raining, then realise air-con is on and fan is on. I'm like, wah lao, Antarctica Ar... Nose blocked again... Hai... Now, my throat is soring, and nose is not very stable either... Wah lao, gonna get sick soon le... Must drink more water... heH!

Got some of our papers back le. I was stunned by my CL results lor! My very 1st time getting a B4, please lor, i was like, "HuH?! Sure not? Got mark wrong mah?!" Shit man, i couldn't believe my eyes... Then, after the checking thru, i realised, ya, it's true, i got a B4, OmG! It sux! It's way too bad le lor, hai... Worse than the O level. How can i sit for another one?! Ok, at least i got an A2 for backup liao... Hai... Maybe i can comfort myself by saying, i didn't study much, but point is, that's not an excuse lah, everybody are saying that, it's so foolish. Lying to yourself nia... Hai...

Other papers were within my expectation bah. Physics, haven't get the full paper, but i guess, most probably i can get my B3, ya, together with Chem of coz. Geog was ok, i didn't do really badly, Miss Ang wants me to aim for an A, ya, hopefully, i'll try harder for O level, 200% harder. And Hui ru told me she saw my result for SS's SBQ, and i passed! HAHA!!!! I AM extremely hAppy bout that Lor! Coz i tot i will fail my SBQ... Hee~ Now that i know i passed, i guess i can have a peace of mind liao.. Hee~

Maths paper is the best!!!! I guess it will be my best paper liao... Way over an A1, that's wad i aimed for and i got it, satisfying... Well, though it's great but can't be complacent right? Gotta continue to work for it! I'm just glad the results on my Mocks didn't come out on my prelim and hopefully, not my O level either... HAHA!

So, prelim is like that... It's over, i guess my next step is to focus more and complete my journey in Sec school with O level.

Just now, went to Ah mah's house, see my ah mah and at the saem time, see my cousins. Wah! Jerome grow so much lor, he started talking and not only that, he speaks chinese liao.. HAHA!!! And then, Jaime, i guess this is the 1st time i saw her, cute little baby. Await her growth.. HeH!

Kk, i'm waiting for Bt kor to log in, but i suppose he's not coming in today, hai... Anyway, not important, just wanna send him his song...(romAnTiC neH)

ConfuSiOnS...

Hey! Wad is wrong with the world huh? Everyone seems to be acting weird... Friends from school are, friends from work are, friends that are indirectly linked to me, are....

Hai... y i say this? U guess leh?! I've been receiving SmSes that kind of confuses me...1st off, Hui ru kept msging me to ask me things which her closest friend should know( coz i'm not those that is very careful bout wad to bring de, i just bring wad i wan) , then, comes strange things happening between xueting and yuting. Then, pple from work leh, even weirder, not to mention wad, but just weird... Then, at home leh, hai... The strange thing is, everybody is not talking... Hai... See, my kor now walking around and i'm not even looking at him. HeH! Ok, might not sound strange to u but, to me, it is VERY!

And i've been reading things which are so out of the world, like not human language like that. goD... Go see Trish Blog and every single time, i'm stucked by the chim chim words. went to check bT kor's blog, i'm always wondering wad's going on in his world wor... AiyO... Even when i read my own blog, i also dunnoe wad i'm writing, y do i always sound so sad de leh?! See, i'm so confused bout everything that's happening... I happened to watch News a few days ago, and i realised, there's been a hurricane or something in the US, and i'm like, huh?! Peculiar...

Gosh, the world is changing and i am caught behind time. Nobody seems to be updating with wad's going on... However, i did come to a conclusion myself. For the sms from Hui ru and the stuff betweeen yuting and Xueting, i guess it's coz this is the last year liao, we're all trying to catch up with wad we did not treasure b4, holding on to the one last chance of being friends, restoring the friendship for some of them.

As for people from work, those bitches, i got no conclusion, they are still bitches. Bout firdaus, it's weird, but ermm... well, nothing has been normal since i know him. For other rumors or gossips, hear no evil...

At home, probably everyone are too busy with their stuff bah. Mama is busy getting back to work, kor kor trying to make another story, 2kor always busy with his own stuff, papa always busy with work and friends. And me, i'm busy with exam and friends. Well, i guess it's time i think bout my family liao... However, i know, no matter how much i tried, my brothers are still my brothers, they dun really bother bout wad i do but i have a lot of opinions bout wad they're doing. i guess meis are always the ones who knows wad is going on, and trying to make their kors and jies see that and yet, it's hard to. hai... An obligation? I dunnoe...

Trish's blog, ok, that, is totally understandable, her EL extreme Pro, it's only natural that someone like me can't understand, at least i can understand half of it. Well, i dun wanna ask too much bout her life, she got stuff hidden in a corner of her heart, i have mine too, i dun wan pple to interfere with it, so i guess she dun wan anyone to do the same. So, i'll still be here, encouraging her when she needs it.

Bt kor's blog leh, i guess after catching up with some of his stuff recently, i can understand y he wrote all those stuff, maybe i can't really be in his situation, at least i can somehow make some picture out of it. I guess, at the end of the day, it's still up to him to choose his next step. We're just looking at it. Well, I believe he can make it de! Y?! Coz he's Chua boH tEck Mah! My Kor Leh... heH!

As for my own blog... Well, thing is, dealing with studies is the hardest thing on earth and at the same time, struggling with so many other stuff, i guess that is normal bah. Complaining is the only thing i can do. Hee~ Moreover, it's woman's right to nag and complain, though i'm not really a woman yet, but i'm kind of hanging in the middle... Aiya, one day will become de lah! Well, for now, i'll do things my own way and just go with the flow bah.

On US's disaster, i can't really help but i can pray for them. GoD bLesS the pple of the US!

Loneliness is something undescriptable. Wad is the meaning of being lonely? Seriously, we all are, yet we are not... Contradicting? Think bout it, when u r alone, feeling lonely, u feel down, wanna cry, need someone to fill that loneliness, want someone to be beside u, but always when u are on the edge of breaking down, someone will come, be it anyone, they r there, for u... So, r u really lonely? r u?!

Ok, next question, Is love the thing we all need?

Unable to have an answer for that coz, again, it's contradicting. The other day, i was asking bt kor, "do i look like i'm desperately yearning for love?" He said "No, not in particular, but it's not wrong to." True enough, it's not wrong to. But do i need one? Sometimes, i thought i need, but most of the time, i dun. I need to be love coz i feel lonely. However, i am not lonely, coz there r pple there for me, so i'm not lonely, i dun need love. Besides, love comes from everywhere, i got love from friends and family. Love from a guy? Nope, i suppose it's not the time yet... Not yet...
never fall in love out of desperation, never say "I love you" when i dun mean it. Now, i only need a shoulder to lie on, just for that comfort... AnYOnE?! heH!

Hao... Now that i've solved some of the qns i have in mind, i'm feeling cool. LoVe IS In tHE Air bUt For nOw, For the tIme BeInG, my heArt iS ClOSed, my MiNd Is FocUSeD. FaLLiNg In tHe CoFfin Of loVe?( wait for me to watch corpse bride 1st then i tell u the consequences, haha), can U read wad i'm saYing?!

Ermm... All these are just to clear some of the qns i have in mind, not just from me, but from friends as well... hee~ DoNe!

I met with this crossroad, and I am caught in a dilemma but it is only a matter of time that I find my way back, to make the decision which will lead me to where I'm gonna be tomorrow.

Heh heH = to hungry? ( this got nothing to do with wad i've written below)

HAHAHA!!!! Now that all the stressful papers are over, i can really sleep... Hee~ However leh, still got one more paper left, D&T theory.. Well well, need to rmb some stuff and that's bout it, prelim will be over soon! JuMping ArouNd lIke SiAo!

PPle already got it planned, tml going to orchard for dinner with friends, Friday, wah... Long day.. With Yuting and Cheryl to Plaza Singapura and then to work. HA! I'm like siao one... Anyway, i wanna get the PerfuMe!!!! TOTALLY! i already got the polo tee and v-cut tee liao... spent $23.10 today.. Hai... But nvm, as long as i'm happy nothing can stop me! toTallY!

LAst night, i checked my friendster and i got a msg from Kelvin, ermmm... Somehow, he told me a lot of things that i can't really see myself. of coz, most of the time, it is the on-lookers who see things clear. yup... Always... Anyway, i didn't know i would reply him that much, i just wanted to explain some of the stuff, i ended up writing a very long essay. HA! ESSAY, u know how long is that... HeH! Anyway, really appreciate some of the words...

Ermm.. LAst night, b4 i went to bed, crapped a lot with bt kor... Funny things were said, but he didn't find it funny, feel so sad... Always wanna make him laugh, then end up, he dun find them funny at all... So TAo YAn... Well, then a phrase from Xueting which comes from another person, came out, "I DUN WANNA DIE A VIRGIN!" HAHA!!! I dun rmb wad we were talking bout, this phrase just came to my mind... Hee~ Then, even frequency came out... I'm not good at this topic... So bt kor corrected me a lot of time, but then, no use, i didn't do the sound, pitch qns today.. Hee~

Needless to say, i'm damn tired now... I slept for less than 3 hours i guess. Went to bed at 1.30am, and only fell asleep at 2.30am and i woke up at 6am.... tired Wor... But hai hao... I FeEl GoOD... Later go take a nap can liao... :P

Ermm... Firdaus kind of msg me and wanted to explain bout the other night... HA! i was just thinking, he dun really have to explain in such details, it's basically ok... Well, he just told me... HeH! Ok, so, out of politeness, i said "Well, it's ok, u dun have to explain to me, i understand" HA! It's funny... Very strange, very weird. And ermmm... The next msg was even weirder... But dun wanna say lah, u wanna know? ASk me bah, if i have the mood i'll tell, if not, HAHA! :P ( Like as if got pple wanna know like that.) NuTs, i'm talking to myself!!!! Going crazy liao, PiLLS! where's my pills?!

HAHa! Ok, i'm really going bonkers, i read 80 cents as 80%... Going crazy over maths... HAhA! That's a good thing, at least i'm concentrating on my studies... LalAlA! AhEM!

O ya, forgot to say, just now the SS paper hor... Wah lao, i write until my hand numb, my arm cramp sia... After tying the papers together, my fingers got stucked there, scare the hell out of me sia... Well, i manage to finish the paper( of coz i must, after the stucking of finger) and probably will have my SEQ better than SBQ. Since i am clear of wad i'm writing in my SEQ... Hee~

Hao LAh.. if there's anything to write, i will write in.. Ciao for NoW! MiSS yOU, MuACK!!!! (going nuts lor... :P)

Today?

So many pple i missed last night... today, no difference, still missing them BUT at least studying brings me away from those...

Hai... Study? Very distracted by my nose... Suddenly got blocked nose... And i used like half a box of tissue... SICk WoR... Hai... But now, better le... Hopefully it's just temporary sickness bah...

Ting and I were talking bout some of the work thing this Friday but she said she couldn't make it le... Feel so sad... I was delighted upon hearing that she's gonna go work with ME! In the end, she can't. Hai... well, it's not her fault, her jie bah... Anyway, i'll be there still, to work, hopefully wun meet with anymore disasters... HeH! Other than this, we talked bout her ride back the other day... And HAHA, she was shocked... HeHe~ Yeah, the breeze was AweSoMe... Hee~ And some stuff she told me, kind of left me with some interpretations... Ermmm.... Not gonna say wad, coz things are vague... Life is like that, FULL of mysteries... Hee~ Ok, the evil me is coming out again... So Bo LiaO...

Ermm... Tml got physics and SS paper... hai... I didn't study much... Physics, hopefully the foundation that i've worked for will be able to be of help TMl... As For SS, mmm... MAybe try to do well for SBQ bah, SEQ, if birth of nation comes out, i will be laughing out loud! I only read thru the Good governance part nia... hai.. HOPE!!!!

So, i got a lot of things to buy with wad little i earned... Hee~ Bon Jovi's album:$22.90 Giodano Tees: All in all bout $30+ CK perfume(small one): $30plus, if can afford might get the big one $60plus(i doubt i can). And lots of upcoming ones, which i haven't find, a bag, a cap and a purse. HeH HeH! Plus, after O level, Rebonding, highlighting.... Wah... I'm gonna be broke.. O ya, i wanna buy a digital CAm too... GoSh... broKe bRokE BroKe... Hai... So, i guess, besides OHS, gotta find another job.. HeH!

By the end of this week, will get the tees, the album and the perfume. So, one week later, i will be $90+ poorer... Hai... Dun come borrow money from me... I can only afford to lend u $1... HeH! Kidding lah!

Time to SlEeP! CiAo!

The true face of human appears, the colours of your face, you are a faker, a man I will never believe anymore...

Missing....

I miss a lot of things... I started to wonder again, y do things change? I couldn't find the answer to this qn.

I miss the Boh Teck Kor who is funny and strict.
- I never knew him, till i left the hotel, he became an important person in my life.

I miss the Xueting who always have little heart problems.
-She has lots of problems, but she never seem to be beaten by it.

I miss the Wan Yu b4 she is with Terry.
-I just wanna find the old fish who can live without the luxury.

I miss the Yuting who shares my joy and pain.
-I need to know, whether the 4 years we shared are real.

I miss the Tingling who i always hang out with.
- She gives me a lot of question marks but she is one person who i admire.

I miss the Chung Ee who talks to me.
-I still wanna talk to the Chung Ee who seriously told me " Give up if there's no end"

I miss the Billy that i once knew.
-I need to find the Billy who is real.

I miss the Firdaus who never told me he likes me.
-Can i still be just the apple who once in a while go round and said "You are so CuTe!"?

I miss the good times i used to have when i 1st stepped into Orchard Hotel.
-I stepped in smiling, i dun ever wanna step out crying.

I miss the people who had been through the thick and thin with me.
- Can i leave this place and pursue my dreams? All these are hurting, too much... I dun wanna be impaled no more.

I miss the little mistakes that i made when i am working.
-I try not to make mistakes but some mistakes are hard to forget, they brought me to where i am today.

I miss the people who stepped into my life and have never left.
-Can u be back? Dun leave... Dun go... Dun change...

Somehow, everything have faded away. I can't catch them at all. Their pace are just too fast for the future to hold. Their choices had caused a huge change to occur. Where were the joy i had? Where can i seek my happiness again? I feel like crying yet the tears are stucked. These things just seem too far to get them back. Too late to retrieve the loss. Can all of those be back once more? No pretence, no cover-up, just the stripped and naked truth. The people that i once knew, the things that i've once touched, the emptiness within has become stronger. I dun want no words of wisdom, just the truth which can last forever. Am I being juvenile again? Please let me know...

Are they all gone?

Ah... BAck Home...

Hey! BAck after a day out... O goSh...

Ermm.. Went to OHs with ting to get my pay. I guess lots of pple misses her... Especially our dear YusOff... HeH! And well, she decided to go back next week, something which i'm happy bout coz i can work with her, and not anybody ELSE!

Hee~ Afterwhich, Da kor came to fetch me and everything goes on... MaMA finally arrived at the belt at bout 9.30pm, man i was beat... Then, went to chalet find cousin... HeH! My cousin was so surprised that i've grown up. Seriously, i did... We all did. HeH!

So reached home at bout 12am... Tired after a whole day but i'm gonna stay up today... Coz the next 2 days, gotta study aGAiN! Ha!

Ermm... Nothing much liao... Lots of fun things happened, i'll just keep the details to myself...

CiAo!

The walk down the aisle is the most amazing thing on earth... The beauty of the day is short yet the memory lasts... Like what we see everyday, couples get together and separates, but it is at that very moment, that point, when you can truely see, the meaning of falling in love and dedicating yourself to that someone... I long for that day to come... (Well, another decade would be just right!Hee~)

For A moRe detAilEd picture...

Oh My GoD! I woke up with my eyes swollen! Not enough sleep perhaps? ANd my ankle hurts... Probably from all the standing i had last night... ShiT...

Anyway, i was so afraid i couldn't concentrate today for maths paper, so i started pouring caffine into my mouth and HA! It worked! I was wide awake by the time i reached school! Hee~ And started with lots of craps with Ting.. HA! No, It's WeNg ShU TiNg!!!! I know she'll start calling me Ai Peng again... HA!

Anyway, Maths paper started, well, for me, it's not as easy as p2 but then everything can be solved in the end... I'm happy bout my Maths, and i was afraid Miss Chong would set an extremely tough paper... It's a good thing... I supposed i can expect myself to get an awesome grade.

Talking bout last night... After venting my anger in the blog, i was fine le... However, i still get angry at the thought of it... SuCks! It's a good thing Chris didn't ill-treat me in any way. O ya, speaking of work, last night, the caps wore staff uni, it's so funny on them. Especially Bt kor... HA! He looked like a kid in it... And i couldn't regconized him. HeH! Plus, he shaved his hair... HeH! Roy looked like a student in it. HAhA!!!

Hai.. Dun wanna talk bout last night liao, i'm getting pissed off by those damn pple... HAi... Y is the world like that man?! Seriously, is it my fault? I just followed the instructions... Aiya.. FuK lah...

One thing to be happy bout, i got to go home early, hAppy WoR... But somehow, office was quite choatic, so i'm like, sitting there, waiting for my voucher yet no one seems to notice my presence... HeH! In the end, Felicia laughed and said "Oi, u dun die there leh" And i'm like, heh heh heh. Funny Huh?!

Ooo.. U know wad? Our graduation night this year is nearly held in OHS... Seriously! That's y the 1st price our school gave was $50 nett... But I guess it's too eX le bah... So Mr tay, being the teacher in charge did the right thing by asking for $40 nett, but well, too low for OHS, i supposed. So in the end, we got a $40 nett one, but i dunnoe wad hotel is it, anyways, our class not going... HEh! Just surprised that our school was so impressed with the hotel. HEh! Amazing huh?! Well, OHS is not bad... Maybe coz i'm in there and i got to know the ugly side of things... LIKE WAD HAPPENED LAST NIGHT! HA!

Alright, later gonna go get my pay with Sister... Then probably shop a little... Tonight going to cousin's chalet... Hai.. So sian... I dun even know y i'm going? I bearly know her since i grew up... I mean, seriously!

K, so i was complaining to everyone and anyone who came to talk to me or i happened to talk to a couple of days ago bout not wanting to work, then today, i went around complaining bout the Fuking thing that happened. HA! I'm so FUNNY!!! SiCkO... Once again, i couldn't let this matter rest, i just hate how pple treat others after they've used them!

Y did they asked me back? They got NO LACK OF USHERERS!!!!

Now, my impression on pple aren't good at all.. How many pple out there can i respect anymore? How ManY?!

ReLax....

Two 17-year-old girls trying to chase wad we've lost... HAHA! SiSTeRS! 

HAhA! NatUrAl CutEneSs!  

CuTe?! 

Ermm.... 

TrUst?

B4 i go and bath and sleep. I wanna say something...

Trust me when u've entrusted me a job. If u trust me, i'll do a good job for u. Dun doubt me, when u r the one who entrusted me with the god damn job. Dun treat me like a fool and start pointing fingers at me when i know wad i'm doing. If i am doing the right thing, i will not burge. And dun give me those fucking face and kept saying "Is it? But Hor!" I've had enough. I am already pissed bout going to work and yet those bitches kept saying and saying and saying. ShIT! COME DO THE JOB IF U ARE SO GOOD AT IT! I AM NOT PAID TO ENTERTAIN THE LIKES OF YOU NOR UR UGLY COMMENTS, I'M ASKED TO GO BACK FOR THEM, NOT YOU! ShiT ThEm... ARROGANT FOOLS!

ArGH!!!!!

Going to sleep liao, tml gotta wake up early to revise a bIt! CiAO!!!

2nd blog...

Alright, 2nd blog of the day. So i guess i still gotta work... SoB SoB.... Wad A tough day...

Chris said if i could get a person to replace, then i wun have to come, sadly, i couldn't find any available. 1st, i called Chung Ee, he said he got something on. Then, i asked Tingling, she's already working. 3rd, i tot of Billy, but he already told me he's working. 4th, i tried to contact Cindy, bothering kelvin on the way, still, i couldn't get her. 5th, i asked Fengling, she didn't reply my msg. LAstly, i asked Sean, he's working tml. So i'm like... WAh lAo! HAi... So i complained bout it to Xueting this afternoon. So sAd... Hai...

I stopped thinking bout it when i started studying, well, that's the best, dun need to think bout it. Chemistry, really focusing hard on it, but i didn't really study all. I focus on this year's topic more coz some are unclear. As for the others, ermm... Will try to briefly read thru tml morning, odd to know most of it but erm... Hopefully can lah.

Ok, something weird just happened. I'm mentioned as "sweet" twice... GOd... 1st, it was from Hui ru, when i merely told her wad to bring for the exam. Then it was from Chris, when i merely said Night to him. Ok, the world is getting really funny nowadays. Also, A few days ago, Yvonne called me to chat? GoSh... Isn't that weird? I mean, i dun really CHAT with Yvonne, i just talk craps with her in class and sometimes bout schoolwork, she called me to chat? O god... Wad's more? Segaff said "good luck" to me b4 exam today when i told him to move in front. Ya, it's polite of him, but it came so suddenly... Heh HEH! Should i laugh bout all these things not? Or feel weird bout it? PeNgz...

Hao... On and on and on... Got so much to bitch bout... Ha! I'm still thinking bout chem now... Wonder whether those that i've studied are enough bo... Hope they will really come out bah...

O YA!!! I wanna say something... Do i look like those pple who do photocopy jobs? This morning, while i was walking home after the paper, when i was waiting to cross the road, this car stopped a distance away from me, and the man asked "No school ar?" So i tot he is somebody's father from our school so i said we got exam, then he asked "Gonna be over soon?" I said "Soon..."( didn't bother to tell him it's only prelim) Then he asked me to go over, knowing that i shouldn't, i still did, and he passed me his namecard and said "After exam, wanna look for part-time job can come look for me." and he drove off... I'm like, WTH... Is he nuts? in the middle of the road? And do i look like those that likes to photocopy? Wah LAo... Funny right this people. I got the printing face meh? SIck...

Hai... Tml is gonna be one of those extremely lOnG days.... Hai... Hope everything will turn out fine... HoPe...

*yAwN* *yAwN*

MAn, it is at this time of the day that my eyes are feeling heavy. It's a good thing the paper is over. Now, i'm slacking at home. No, not really slacking, i just printed out one last part(finally) of the D&T and at long last, i'm free from D&T till the next paper... At least there's no folio to think bout.

Having such long chats enlighten me... Sometimes, these people just came out of no where and then come out with words that give me an idea of wad i'm trying to do. This time round, Bt kor did just that. Many pple played that role in my recent life, hai... How come i need so much enlightment de? DiAo... Ha! Anyway, got things figured out. And hope he will get wad's stuck in his head, freed...

I'm gonna call Chris later. It's still early, dun wanna disturb him. I'll go get my nap 1st... YaWn..

Then, gonna start cracking liao.. Tml is Chemistry paper, man i gotta score well for this coz the paper 1 and practical seem to be gone-case... HeH! HAi..

Just a short morning msg to get my aim in mind... YeaH...

My mind will not rest unless I got my message across to those that are concern... Till then...

Bruised....

O well... I guess 3 days just went by like that... And i am totally drained... SomeBoDy! HELP!!!

HEh! Ok, so prelim started and till now, everything was fine i guess... HAd the paper1s, they're all good. Had EL p2, it was ermm... Not very bad i supposed. Geog paper was the best so far.. I understand the qns and answered accordingly. Write until my hand numb... PLus, today's MAths P2, let me tell u, IT WAS AWESOME! I know almost all the qns man.. Or rather, all the qns that came out were those that we should know how to do. There's just a couple which i can't figure out. HApPY! Ermm... Science P1... Chem was tough... Well, out of 5 days, 2 days are over, and got 6 more papers to sit for... We're given plenty of time to rest and study... That's the best.

I'm still thinking whether to go to work on Thurs not, although i've promised Chris, I feel very tired... HAi... We'll just see bah...

Sometimes, i dunnoe y, pple tend to complicate things. Some stuff are so easily understood, they just make it SO difficult, i wonder y. Maybe i shouldn't blame them or wad lah, they may not see the pattern that i do.

Yesterday, Billy came to me and said Sunday everything was screwed in the hotel, i'm like, "Is it?!" HEh! WAD did he expect me to say? He actually told me in a blaming tone that y didn't i come. HEh! Funny huh, these pple...

Recently, there's so many movies that i wanna watch, Corpse bride, Cinderalla man and lord of the dog. Nice Movie Wor... But then, prelim, no $$... Wanna buy Bon Jovi's album, Disney T, polo T, and CK perfume... WAh! I guess i gotta save up sia...

Hai... Starting to miss mama liao... Every year de Mid-autumm, mama will buy all these mooncakes, but this yr, hai... No mooncake... Sian... ANd i spent that day alone at home... The guys are so not good one... Aiya... Mama not home, they rebel... HA! I'm gonna report them! HAHA!!! Bao Too Kia... HAhA! Nah.. I'm not so bad lah..

I'm drained by all the battles. My body has got nothing left to offer. My heart is shattered. It's telling me to give up, let it go. But then, my mind is telling me not to. This complication, this contradiction, how can it be resolve? This battle has been fought but the result is unclear. The journey is far from over... I need to be enlighten... I need to be awaken... In this world, there is no pain, just hardship.

All i can do is DO!!!!

Survivor IS BACK!!!! Survivor: Guatemala! HAhAha!!! So happy to see it again... It was half a year ago when Survivor: Vanuatu was shown. A show i tried very hard not to miss... Love it too MUCH!!!!

Anyway, i had an entire day at home yesterday relaxing... Ermm... I was a bit lost, dunnoe wad to do, coz i dun feel like studying, dun feel like packing up my stuff, so i decided to do the dishes, after that, i was very satisfied with myself, hee~

And i just came back from another round of laundry and dishes, plus making the bedSSSS!!!! HAHA! Wah, didn't know i can be so helpful de wor... After this, maybe i should sweep the floor bah... If i was like this last time, ma wun be that busy liao... HAHA! So in future, i should try to help more bah, if ever i can dig out some time! No proB!

Just now, i went to get my folio from ting coz Miss Lim says there's a lot of amendments. Truth is, there ain't much, i'll complete them by today, or the end of this sunny afternoon. HeH! Then i can start with my revision liao... OR is it continue with my revision. Hee~ Should start off with Maths... YeAh!

Then, i went to Westmall, carrying 2 folios... Hai... So troublesome, and along the way, things kept dropping, so paiseh... But nvm, in a while i'm back home liao. Hee~ O ya, YiyUAn saw me, but i didn't see him, he very funny de wor, can just come up and say hello mah, he msg me and left me in complete confusion. O ya, and i saw Si en, She was going for tuition, so after some short HeLLos, i went to wait for bus liao...

Tonight leh, i'm gonna eat leftovers again... Hai... Now that mama is not at home, i seem to be the only one doing things. My brothers leh, ask them to wash their clothes hor, in the end, papa is the one washing for all of them... Sucks one leh! Cannot have some initiatives one leh, somemore, papa's leg hor, dunnoe y, is wrapped up, think it's hurting bah, they all dunnoe how to sympathize one leh. SiCko... So i ended up washing the dishes, washing the clothes and making their beds. Hai... GuyS... Should i say they are useless? Hai... For most part, YES!

Sometimes i wonder, how do pple fall in love? I dunnoe how i fell in love... Was it because of the certain features of someone that attracts them? Or is it the "click" that they feel for each other? It's so fascinating. And pple actually commit suicide coz of a broken love. I was writing bout it in my essay for chinese yesterday, and many thoughts came out, and i started questioning myself. What exactly is the definition of love? Does loving means having? Does loving means giving? Does loving means, dying for that someone? Ermm... Find it quite foolish yet i guess, it's the most beautiful thing that exist in this planet. Well, most beautiful also means the ugliest... Some people are just so infautated by it, so much so that they are lost in it yet they never know, until they are awaken by reality. Ok, wadever, that was just because of my essay.... I guess time will tell me wad is love... Hee~

How do we use the word "Erstwhile"? Is it, "I broke the law erstwhile"? Sounds really weird u know... HA! Ok, will go ask teacher how to use it... By the way, it means "In the past"...

Well, i guess choosing not to go work is a great decision, at least i was able to sit down, relax, do some housework and not feel tired at all... Anyway, that's how life goes right? I got plenty of time to work in future, for most part of my life, to be exact. HA!

Ok, i'm done for now... CiAo!

Light is energy, making visible anything that produces it, also anything that receives and is illuminated by it, such as the moon and virtually any other object we see....

In a mood that is beyond description.

Finally... I'm back to the comfort of typing blog... TO LET MY STRESS OFF!!!!!

1st OFF, i finally, at LONG LAST, completed both my D&T artefact AND folio! I AM SO eXtremely, tremendously, absolutely, undoubtedly HAPPY!!!!!!!! HAHA! After 9 months of struggle, I'm DONE! Most of us are, actually, so happy for everyone! HEe~ HA! Finally, can let off some steam. I've been burning midnight oil for DAYS! Since last week, the whole holiday, i was awake till 3 to 4 am, the earliest was 1.30am. Can u believe that? Wah lAo... And i woke up early to do again, if not, sleep till afternoon. Such Pig... Anyway, the sufferings are over, from today onwards, i dun have to burn oil liao, sleep early for all exams! YeAH!

These few days were quite tedious, besides, sleeping late, went to school with quite a bit of scoldings from teachers, coz we were all rushing D&T, all the other works were undone, almost everyone are like that. And Miss Wang was SO mad today, she started scolding us... HeH! Ermm... True enough, "Dun let me despise you coz of your attitude!" Hai... So sad... Felt a twinge in my heart when i heard that, i mean, well, was never scolded with that word b4, nobody exactly despise us, we used to be so much respected by everyone, even the teachers... Hai...

Ermm... I LOST MY ENGLISH PRACTICE BOOK!!!!!!!!!!!! Sux! In there, holds all the essential things for EL, from vocabs to structure, to tenses and all else, i LOST It!!!! I was so devastated by it. Looking everywhere, turning everywhere upside down just to find it, but i couldn't. No where to be seen! And i started crying... HAHA!!! Man, i was damn emotional just now... Seriously, felt really bad that i've lost it... Gotta go back to school tml to find find find. While studying, i was so distracted for the fact that i dun have the book, and i felt very uncomfortable without it. However, after some pondering, realised it's no use lah, so i started digging for worksheets and went thru the formats. Afterwhich, went on with Chinese de... Hee~

So now, i'm looking at some words from the reading log and typing all this... Isn't it eccentric for me to be doing all this? I dun usually go to the extend of going thru reading log de, but well, i decide that it's time to... You know, after the MYE results, all sorts of worries began to swirl in my head, so, gotta be conscientious with it. Plus, coz i didn't do any revision lor, so i'm qualm bout everything. Anyway, i'm perservering...

People assumed that i have the propensity to do things on time, but i supposed most are quite surprised after seeing me not doing my maths, Chem and Chinese homework at the beginning of the week. HeH! I'm sure the guys were, from their expressions, can see.

Christopher called me to go work tml, for the pent house BBQ again, it was really tempting me, A LOT! Coz not only can u feel the ambience, it's relaxing, pay is pretty good, it is also a luxury to serve these high-class pple. HA! VERY tempting! However, after much pondering, i rejected the offer, coz well, i know wad's right at this point of time. Going out and walk a bit is fine, going to work? Nope, too long, too tiring, wun be able to make it, need to mug NeH! I nearly fell victim to that debilitating weakness, temptation.

I found this line quite nice, "As if to cloak his sorrow, the fog obscured the beauty of the mildly dramatic coastline" Nice... Sorrow... Beauty of Language..

HAi... Wadever it is, tml is the beginning of Prelim exams liao... Not going to be tempted by anything... Jia You! Can make it de!

O ya, mama went to China to relax a bit. So i guess i'm the only lady in the household now. Today is the beginning of "without mama", i washed my own clothes, plates, cups and do all the things myself. HAi... Feel a bit empty without mama, no one to shout across from the room, no one to talk to b4 sleep... Hai... Well, nvm, she's gonna be back next Thurs. Hopefully, nothing will happen within the house... I beg that my kors wun bring friends here to party... PRAY! Wad is mAmA Doing? I'm sure she's sneezing, now that i thought of her, HEH!

Somehow, the weight is lifted a little, having done my D&T, i'm sure most of the people in our group can secure a B3 and above. Also, having CL results liao, taking the 2nd time to try my luck a little. All else, need to concentrate on EL, i'm sure i can do it, as long as i'm consistent in my work. YeAh! Confident! Can make it de, problems wun dissipate like that, we have to either solve it, or completely succumb it.

Ok, I just feel good bout things, wun be giving myself too much stress, just gonna do things like i used to. Well, here i am, back to the original spot i was a year ago, however, one thing is different, i am doing this to move on to the next phase of my life. Another chapter that is yet to be reviewed. My LiFe....

Meticulously taking one step at a time...

Mug mUg muG

Ermm... Trying to overcome the fear of not finishing D&t folio.. Hai.. I did wad i told myself, not to touch it today, coz i am seriously studying for tml's practical. Now, relax a bit, been sitting there for the last 3 hours, trying to get wadever procedures into my head so as to get the right test... Hai... This is for Chemistry... Physics leh... Ermm... Frankly, lots of common sense needed lor... Hai... My poorest is circuit, must seriously know how to connect them sia... Cham.. Hopefully can make it, or rather dun come out.. HAHA!!! Other than that, ermm... I dunno liao... About physics, everything seems so vague... Hai... Maybe coz there's too many Chem practical liao.. HeH! Anyway, after half an hour, will be back to mugging le...

In the midst of all the studying, i just kept thinking bout D&T lor... How?! Now, i got not enough technical paper to move on. Still got quite a bit undone, and i believe, even if i've completed everything, there will be a lot to redo... Hai... And Miss Lim wan us to bind tml?! O god... Please... Show me a way... Too much to handle at this moment... SO MUCH!!!!

Last night, went to get CASh from OHS... HeH! Was alone... So dot dot dot... i was like strolling from cheers to 7-11 then to OHS... No one around i know... Sian... Drinking coffee... Waiting.. While standing there looking at the list, Andy walked pass... And i'm like, oooo.... HEH! Somebody to talk to liao... He's waiting for the others... So we talked bout lots of things... Bout y he got banned, bout the nuts he's looking for, for Sasa, bout his bike few years ago, bout his car license.. And blah blah blah... Everything bout him... HAHA!!! Good, know a little more liao...

Went upstairs...And i saw Tingling, her eyes red.... I'm like, "U cry ar?!" Her leg was is pain, her toe to be exact. Her nail came off, and it's wrapped so big! Plus, the partner she was working with... Hai... Beginning of the night, she was complaining to me bout her... HAi... Wah lao... That person... So cham... Feel so bad, wasn't there for her... And i believe her ma wanna work OT that's y she gotta work too... Her face was so "pulled down" Hai... Poor thing...

Anyway, went home later... Pa and ma and kor SO SO SO paranoid!!!!! Can't stand them lor, kept bombing my phone... It's not like i nv went home at that time b4 lor... So sickening!

Way back, met Andy36? HeH! And all the way, very awkward, dunno wad to say...

Anyway, back home, started with D&T again... 3am.... Can't stand... Sleep...

Nothing else left to write le... Gonna go back to studying LOR!!!! CiAo!